I may just be imagining this. I don't even know how something like it would even feel. However, despite all that I think I may be in love. With who you ask? Well, my best friend, I know right, so classic love story right.
Where to even start. Oh, I know the beginning.
Picture this, a dorky little-flute playing 5th grader, sitting and laughing in her 1st day of band class as the teacher takes attendence. Then a cute, chuncky, spikey-haired, saxophone playing 5th grade boy walks in. I stop talking and laughing and watch as this mystery boy sitts down. I knew right then, he was going to be my friend.
Skip ahead to lunch receses. I'm walking to this cute little boy, lets call him Joe, and his other cute friend, Bill. The whole walk there, I'm still trying to work up the courage to talk to him. As I get there they both look up and smile and say "hi". From there, we are good friends.
Lets go past elementary, besides the fact that i made a great friend, nothing much happened.
Jr. High hits and everyone starts to drift apart. Joe and Bill still talk to me. But not like before. Then it hits...BOOM...i think i have a crush on Joe. Jr. High continues and everyone gets close again, causing mischeif, and even a trip or two to the princapals office. Now whenever i see Joe the happier my heart gets.
Freshman year at high school now. I drop my AP english for regular english and who is in there? Thats right Joe. What great times. Non-stop laughing, and water drinking contests. Now when i see him, my stomach starts to flip and butterflies are unleashed. Not even just when i see him but when i hear his name too. We get even closer, and i catch him secretly taking pics of me. But i let it pass. I get a secret message saying that some one thinks im wonderful, and i think its from him. I can only hope.
Sophmore year, and as i am sitting in my first hour class, he walks in. Needless to say my friend, Joe, and I become great friends. As sophmore years gets closer to an end, something i call the dark times happened. Some rumors happened, with him supposibly saying he thought i was annoying. I was hurt, no devasted. But i decided to brush it off and forget. The next day was the start. He didnt talk to me, he woulnt even look at me. He didnt walk with me to my 2nd hour or 6th hour anymore either. That night i cried myself to sleep. I had no idea why either. The next day was saturday, and i sat in my room remembering the good times before that. My heart flutters, butterflies released, and as i am sitting there smiling i realize, maube i love him. As i try those words together my heart gives a not to gentel squeeze. I knew then that i loved him.
As the days of darkness continues i continue to cry myself to sleep. At some points it gets so bad i can hardly breathe. I wish it would end.
At last they do, but you can tell it's not the same, and that makes me even more sad.
Now we are at jr year in high school. We are still best friends and i still wish we were more than that. Every night i sit with sadness as i try to wrap my head around the fact that he has a.....girlfriend. It makes me cry sometimes. She doesnt know his likes and dislikes like i do. She doesnt know his type of music or like it like i do. It hurts that i cant with him and she can.
If only he knew how i felt. If only.....
Quote: "I blame Disney movies for allowing me to grow up believing that everything has a happy ending."-unkown
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